Disorder in the Man Cave

Being a parent is tough, but when you add a child with special needs or some form of a disorder it becomes a much tougher task. That is the case in my home. My youngest son has to deal with mild Depression and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, otherwise known as ADHD.

Simply put, and I stress simply, my son is incredibly hyper and impulsive at times and has difficulty paying attention. Myles is the sweetest little boy on the planet and he will do anything for his big brother (including drive him nuts when his friends are around), but he struggles with knowing his limits. He finds it necessary to constantly be on the go which isn't a bad thing, but can be when he is supposed to be seated quietly in school. He has difficulty paying attention during such simple tasks as homework. A fifteen minute homework session can become an hour long episode of “sit down” and “repeat what I said”.

He tests my patience like no other, but I know it is not his fault. He is only eight and needs to learn how to help himself overcome and control this disorder he has to deal with. It's not debilitating, but it does cause him trouble at times. A part of me wonders if he just a boy and the behavior he exhibits is due to his age and gender (it’s pretty obvious boys are nuts at times, ADHD or not). He gets so frustrated with himself and I can see him struggle, but doesn’t everyone do that?

However, his pediatrician and former teachers felt that he was exhibiting behaviors consistent with ADHD and after some simple tests which confirmed their beliefs he began taking medicine to help him control his hyperactivity and to help him focus better. I wasn’t completely on board at first, because let’s face it, I grew up in the 80’s and the whole Ritalin phase was a bit scary. I didn’t want my son to become a zombie who simply existed. I didn’t want his artistic approach to life to be stifled in any way.

You see, Myles is an extremely creative little man. He has never been one to play with toys, but he is an amazing artist and can sit for hours drawing and coloring. He has always been this way and I was afraid the medication they prescribed for him would change this about him. I was not in denial that something needed to be done, but I was not going to be quick to decide what that avenue would be. Just like any good parent out there, I wanted to do the best possible thing for my son. I want his life to be as happy as possible. So, I did a lot of research and tried to learn as much as I possibly could about the disorder. I am sure I drove my sons’ doctor and nurse nuts with questions, but they didn’t let on that I did. Thank goodness for their patience!

Once he started the medication, he did change. He started to calm down and do a little better in school. By no means did he improve drastically. He still has days when he is crazy, but that’s how he is supposed to be and I don’t mind it a bit. He’s a boy and he is supposed to be a little wild and adventurous.

After a year of trying the medication pathway, my husband and I decided that we wanted to lower Myles' dose of medication so that we could see how he is without it masking the person he is. He's not much different, which makes me wonder if they were dosing a kid who was just being a kid. His teacher has even noticed a positive change in him and she did not know we had lowered his dose. It's all very confusing and quite annoying to be honest. Our society is quick to create drug addicts through the large pharmaceutical firms with no regard to the people they are affecting. My son will not be one of the government created drug addicts. Due to the medications, Myles has lost too much weight and developed odd heart rate patterns.

I think we are on the right path to help him. I know this is not the case for all kids with this disorder, but it is working for us. There are some kids that need these medications to improve their way of life. I get that. However, my son is not one of those kids. For now, we are going to take things one day at a time. That's all we can do at this point.

Do you have a child with ADHD or something similar? How has medication affected your child? Send me a message and share your experience.